TAY Atmosphere

Genuine curiousity: Can someone share a link to a public internet forum of decent size/activity that they think is a good example of the kind of debate and tone you'd like here?

Why can't we use the standard of: if you were in a pub, sitting around a table of like-minded enthusiasts, enjoying a guinness, would you say something to their face that would make them feel invalidated? It's harder to be a bully while looking in her/his eyes. Likewise, nuance is much better understood, in person. But online, most, if not all nuance is lost, making sarcastic remarks seem all the more insulting (we don't see your mischievous wink at the end of your sentence). I agree with Marcus's micro-managing the online interactions a little closer than our cousin sites.

Genuine curiousity: Can someone share a link to a public internet forum of decent size/activity that they think is a good example of the kind of debate and tone you'd like here?

My favorite site on the whole internet:
www.turns-all-year.com

Genuine curiousity: Can someone share a link to a public internet forum of decent size/activity that they think is a good example of the kind of debate and tone you'd like here?

A quick Google search turned this one up. I am not a member.

poultrycommunity.com/forum/showthread.ph...-hens.....HELP/page3

I would guess the increase in negativity ... comes because negativity brings forth more negativity Nudging somebody to tone it down can cause...(them to)...act out with more negativity.

I’m all for differing opinions & debate but (for the above reason) when a post violates the terms I think it should be deleted as quickly as possible and without discussion.

Obviously due to “grey areas” this is easier in theory than reality. Humor may often be a culprit- what one person thinks is funny another may find offensive or just weird. I’ve certainly made a few satirical posts that probably came across poorly to many but were never intended to be mean spirited. I’d hate to eliminate joking altogether but we need to be careful with it.  Poking fun at and teasing friends is a common form of humor- many of the things my friends say to me (especially after a few hours/days in the mountains)  would be way out of bounds for a stranger to say. It gets complicated on the web where you have “virtual” friends.

You are doing a great Job Marcus & moderators. Thanks.

More photos & larger files would be good.

I keep seeing in this thread discussion of personal attacks, bullying and mean-spiritedness. I really don't recall seeing much if any of this in the time I've been a member, which covers a few years now.

What I have seen (along, of course, with a lot of great stuff) is a good deal of thin-skinnededness (like that?) and defensiveness when people are challenged on their behaviors or positions. Instead of defending their points they lash out. And it ain't Scotsman that's doing the lashing though I suspect he relishes being made the villain and all it does is add fuel to the fire. DUH!

I have to say that PNW Brit and Scotty - TAY's favorite scapegoats - are damned good friends of mine and some of my favorite people with whom to ski. They are not mean-spirited bullies and they'd go miles out of their way to help someone in need. What they are - besides being passionate, experienced and skilled (well, Brit anyway - ) skiers - are guys that don't suffer fools gladly (why they let me hang around is an ongoing question in this regard) and have no problem calling bullshit when they think it's deserved. You may not agree with their callouts, but instead of lashing out at them, banning them or deleting their (or others') posts, why not take the time to read between the lines and think about the comments and respond without being defensive. Perhaps you deserve the callout, perhaps not, but engage in debate. Hearty debate does not always have a civil tone, and those two certainly don't get their knickers in a twist when someone gives them a hard time.

I sometimes call my friends bad names when I disagree with them or when they're misbehaving and they do the same to me, and I don't think that they have no right to do so because I disagree, and I don't really care to hang out with people who can't stand a little torment from time to time.

Frankly, if you feel bullied by an anonymous voice on a ski-message board I'm a bit worried about you. How do you manage to negotiate rush hour traffic or a grocery store line? Do you run from a job interview in tears with your tail between your legs because the HR gal asked you hard questions?

In the early days of my TGR membership I made a couple of gaffs - completely unintentionally - that got a lot of crap heaped on my JONG ass. While it stung a bit I learned from it, and realized that when you are participating in any internet forum you may be exposing yourself to criticism or ridicule at some point. Knowing that this possibility exists should teach the poster to ensure that their posts won't put them in a position in which they do not want to be. If you can't accept that your position might be unpopular and open to criticism and deal with it like an adult when (not if) it happens, than you should probably not be involved in discussion forums. Don't rely on Marcus to protect you, protect your own bad self with your good sense, sense of humor, and well-earned wisdom!

IMHO, and very H it is, it seems by reading some of these comments that there are some folks here who take themselves WAY too seriously, and don't know how to deal with it when someone gives them a little shit. If you don't like it don't read it, and if you can't take a little crap, make sure you don't attract it.

There are certainly some characters here, and some people who's posts rub me the wrong way sometimes, but I wouldn't ever suggest they should be edited, banned or not be allowed to speak their minds and I'd hope they would never suggest I shouldn't be allowed to respond. To Marcus I say moderate with a light hand, offer the opportunity in private to edit or clarify before ever deleting or editing posts, or banning members who've pissed you off. To the general membership I say sack up, grow up, be willing to laugh at yourself, be willing to accept that you sometimes engage in buffoonery and that someone will probably call you out for it. It happens to everyone in lots of different arenas. Why should this one be any different?