RIP Shane McConkey

What I meant was I think there are really two threads competing here, one concerned with saying only good things about a popular guy who met his end, and the other in which people judge the choices and consequences of the matter in order to personally relate to it in the context of their own potentially risky activities. Judging McConkey would be pointless at this point (not necessarily saying it ever wasn't), but I don't think that's really what's going on here. These kinds of threads are more about the posters than the subject, and to be honest I think that's really their only real purpose, if any. It's not the news, it's not a memorial service--it's a forum. You want to talk about it? You want to express your feelings on the matter? This is the place.

That was my take too while reading this thread. It's not a surprise that this sort of death kind of cuts close to home, and prods folks to process it a bit. Some people here have had to reflect hard on their own risk management, and some have  lost people who were close to them due to deaths in the mountains. I'm guessing that for these latter folks in particular, it is especially challenging not to allow any judgment to creep in when seeing a news story like this posted here. And as a community forum, it is also not suprising that they work some of their thoughts out here. Judging them for judging is, well, judgmental! And so the snake eats its tail.

RIP Mr. McConkey. You provided some fine entertainment and inspiration.

I'm really surprised at the number of people who don't seem to respect the fact that a person's choices are his own. None of anyone else's business really...

It matters that Shane McConkey's death was a public act.

He didn't just ski-BASE off a cliff, he did it with cameras rolling to capture every moment from every possible angle.  The sole purpose of those cameras was to showcase his ability to take spectacular risks and not die.  There was no other social value to this act.

Some people find this inspiring, others don't.  When you make the choice to live this way, you accept that people can either praise you or condemn you for it.  If it's okay to praise Shane for his public acts, then it must also be okay to criticize him for the same thing.  They are two sides of the same coin.

Still, in reviewing my previous post, I don't think I made any judgments about Shane's choices.  My observations were directed at his public.

Once more into the breach.....
You miss my point and perhaps need to re-read some of the posts in this thread. There are some - even you to some degree in your first line - who imply that because he did what he did he was a lesser father and/or husband, or that he did not care enough for his family. I never said he was better than anyone else nor would I. Others have implied that the risk takers with families are lesser because of the choices they make to continue to take large risks. Achievements in sport are irrelevant to what I'm trying to get across.

I'm really surprised at the number of people who don't seem to respect the fact that a person's choices are his own. None of anyone else's business really, and as you weren't there when Shane and his wife discussed this stuff you have no idea (nor do I of course) what they decided was best for them, except that he continued to do these things.

You might disagree with the choices I make for myself and my family and I might disagree with yours, but that doesn't make any of them 'wrong' nor does it give anyone the right to suggest that he didn't love his family.

Criminy folks, what happened to 'live and let live', and not to get all biblical here, 'judge not lest ye be judged', 'let he who is without sin cast the first stone' and all that stuff?

Live your own life, make your own choices and own them, and let everyone else do the same!

I frankly do not care what someone else does so long as it does not interfere or harm the rights of someone else. This includes jumping off of Italian cliffs wearing flying wing suits.

None of us knew McConkey. OK, perhaps the person you "know that knows him very well "does.We saw what happened when cameras where rolling, when magazine writers and editors were near. That's it.We don't know what happens behind closed doors. No one knows the depth of a couple's relationship other than those 2 people. Everything is pure speculation.

Shane McConkey was an excellent skier, a passionate innovator and a very nice man. But false and blind hero worship in adults is troublesome. You can't tell me the tired cliche of "well....he died what he loved doing most.". Because deep down, I think what he really loved most doing was coming in the door to his house and seeing his family.

It's still about Shane. He lived his life the best way he knew how.

WTF? Was he one of them Duke boys from Hazard Co.?

I didn't know Shane McConkey, but here is a photo of him taken by my brother Carl. It was at the 1998 Canadian Free Skiing Championships at Blackcomb, B.C. (click to enlarge).

I would be happy to make scans of this photo available to Shane's family and friends.

That's a nice offer Lowell, and a cool picture, and I appreciate your perspective greatly. You certainly have one up on the rest of us experientially and spiritually.

There's no blind her worship coming from me. All I'm trying to do is stand up for anyone's right to make their own choices, good or bad, right or wrong, while living their lives. I for one have no business even commenting on others' decisions for themselves let alone passing moral judgment. If others are confident enough in their own righteousness to do so then so be it, and it appears that's the case.

Fini.

[Edited to clarify below]

Seems to be layer upon layer of judgment going on here.  People judging risk-takers and people judging those who judge risk takers, etc.

Fact is, it is human nature to judge what others do.  In some respect it is how we place ourselves in the spectrum of life's activities.  Not an unimportant exercise.

We do not understand the risk that his wife accepted when she chose to marry and start a family with Shane, but she must have known.  Clearly the child had no choice.  To have entered that relationship may have taken more guts than actually launching off a cliff or base jumping.

I know that it is very common for those who took up risky sports when they were young and single, or married without kids to dramatically scale back these activities or at least take action to reduce the risk after kids.  Most swore that they would never change when they got married.  I can tell you from my personal experience that having a kid completely alters your perspective.  My guess is that this happens to most but not all.  Why not to some?  Maybe it is because all of my acquaintances had other vocations other than rock climbing or skiing.  Maybe that is not the reason, I don't know...

[Aside from Shane.] [Here I did not want to imply that Shane was selfish, rather I meant aside from the topic of Shane's death.]  There are many selfish people on this planet (to some degree just about everyone not in a monastery, and even that is probably debatable).  Those who are addicted to drugs or whatever.  Many with clearly self-destructive behavior that at some point was voluntary.  Many of these people get married, have kids, or somehow affect others in their lives.  When the activities lie outside the law or societal acceptance we all feel free to judge.  For extreme sports advocates this seems like a gray area.  What Shane was doing at the time he died was within the law and in fact he was making his living.  However BASE jumpers often flaunt the law for their own pleasure.

I think each person needs to (and will) come to their own understanding.  

What concerns me more than whether Shane deserves respect or not, is how the media promotes risk taking and the elevation of that sort of risk to some higher plain.  Being cool jumping off the next highest cliff, constant videos of skiers triggering and then outskiing avalanches (ala Warren Miller, etc.), all the while the skiers are making statements about how well they understand exactly what they are doing.  That is bull.  How many car commercials feature squealing wheels and high speed driving through narrow streets, etc. That is bull.  SUV commercials in areas where they had to helicopter the stupid thing up to where they actually filmed.  That is bull.

Is there something to aspire to here?

Unfortunately that is our society.