RIP Shane McConkey

I would dare to say it is impossible to be any kind of husband or parent if you are not present and alive.

Being really good at skiing off large cliffs wearing a wingsuit does not put anybody above (or below) anybody else in terms of "lesser" or "greater" as humans, IMHO. Does that make him/her a "better" person, than say, Tiger Woods, who excels in his field but which does not have the higher level of risk? No.

Once more into the breach.....
You miss my point and perhaps need to re-read some of the posts in this thread. There are some - even you to some degree in your first line - who imply that because he did what he did he was a lesser father and/or husband, or that he did not care enough for his family. I never said he was better than anyone else nor would I. Others have implied that the risk takers with families are lesser because of the choices they make to continue to take large risks. Achievements in sport are irrelevant to what I'm trying to get across.

I'm really surprised at the number of people who don't seem to respect the fact that a person's choices are his own. None of anyone else's business really, and as you weren't there when Shane and his wife discussed this stuff you have no idea (nor do I of course) what they decided was best for them, except that he continued to do these things.

You might disagree with the choices I make for myself and my family and I might disagree with yours, but that doesn't make any of them 'wrong' nor does it give anyone the right to suggest that he didn't love his family.

Criminy folks, what happened to 'live and let live', and not to get all biblical here, 'judge not lest ye be judged', 'let he who is without sin cast the first stone' and all that stuff?

Live your own life, make your own choices and own them, and let everyone else do the same!

Sure, everybody dies... and some people can't live without, how shall we say, trying not to die. Let that be a euphemism for seeking out those experiences that are 'Real'--feeling most alive when faced with the alternative. Well fine. Live and let live sounds good.

But let's think about

make your own choices and own them

for a second. Do kids get to choose their parents? Is throwing oneself off of a cliff 'owning' one's choice to raise children? It seems that life can be full of these dilemmas. It also seems little can really be said without passing judgment, after all.

But you can stop worrying about disgracing Shane McConkey. This thread isn't even about him anymore...

I don't think anyone's suggesting he didn't love his family, at least not that I can see.  

Every time someone dies doing like this, the same conversation happens.  Live and let live doesn't mean others can't discuss and question the choices you've made.  The fact is that when you've got kids/husband/wife/parents you're subjecting them to some of the fallout of the risks that you take.  It's hard for most people (including myself) to justify that amount of risk vs. the reward.  But as you say, that's why we're all different, I guess.

Sure, everybody dies... and some people can't live without, how shall we say, trying not to die. Let that be a euphemism for seeking out those experiences that are 'Real'--feeling most alive when faced with the alternative. Well fine. Live and let live sounds good.

But let's think about for a second. Do kids get to choose their parents? Is throwing oneself off of a cliff 'owning' one's choice to raise children? It seems that life can be full of these dilemmas. It also seems little can really be said without passing judgment, after all.

But you can stop worrying about disgracing Shane McConkey. This thread isn't even about him anymore...

Much can be said without passing judgment. Looking self-righteously down your nose at someone else's life because you wouldn't live your life the same way is passing judgment. Honoring a person whose life is gone without picking his personal decision-making process (which we really know nothing about) apart - whether or not you agree with their choices - is not.

It's still about Shane. He lived his life the best way he knew how. He contributed enormously to skiing as we know it today. There was a terrible accident. He and his family deserve our compassion (which precludes judgmentalism), not our criticism.

Thank goodness there are people like him around.

What I meant was I think there are really two threads competing here, one concerned with saying only good things about a popular guy who met his end, and the other in which people judge the choices and consequences of the matter in order to personally relate to it in the context of their own potentially risky activities. Judging McConkey would be pointless at this point (not necessarily saying it ever wasn't), but I don't think that's really what's going on here. These kinds of threads are more about the posters than the subject, and to be honest I think that's really their only real purpose, if any. It's not the news, it's not a memorial service--it's a forum. You want to talk about it? You want to express your feelings on the matter? This is the place.

Sorry to harsh on your well-intentioned thread though. No good deed goes unpunished, especially on the internet.