I feel feverish. Anybody else feel this way?

Anxiety eagerness impatience jealousy selfishness cautionless excitement anticipation hunger need hurry fear slide must thrill hyper breathtaking ready insane launch

Does this list mean anything to anybody? I think this is a small collection of our collective emotions as we near the end of a climb and mentally start to transition to downhill mode. I cycle through most or all of these feelings …every…single…time. And I am not a big line, aggressive skier. It has to be physiologically akin to a drug need.

I feel it in me. I see it in your faces when I ski with you, and when it’s reflected back at me, it makes me hurry all the more. It’s the lust to feel the slide, the glide, the release to gravity. To be first. To be graceful. To fly. Yes I see it in your face, and if you beat me, well, not next time. And because I see it bubbling under your calm surface, it’s why we’re friends. Or co-dependants. Let me make it a little more concrete. No, make it powdery. No…silky.

We approach the top of the hill at Yodelin. Not a dramatic hill. Been there many times before. We’ve been working uphill and in spite of the wind, I’m sweating. I’m tired. Better drink something, eat something, check our gear again. But, dang! This is new snow. I’ve never seen it this white. It’s never quite fluffed across my skis quite like this. I’ve not ever touched this particular blanket before. I look around, down, farther east, higher up the ridge. What the heck?!! There’s nobody else here…there are no stinking tracks anywhere! This is OURS! My pace quickens, my heart is thudding, partly from the climb, mostly from the NEW WHITE POWDER! OK, (partner- insert your name here) is taking off his pack. Good, he’s sitting down. YES! He’s getting out his water bottle. I am going…I’ll pretend to wait…I am gonna be FIRST! Hurry, get the skins off, hurry, repack, oh man! How can he sit there? Wow, this is deep. What if I crash? I’ll look stupid. Careful, there is a LOT of snow. There are some terrain traps. Oh Geez…I can’t believe the slipperiness of this powder, I can NOT believe those IDIOTS are back on the groomers, paying $60 + bucks for a ticket to wade through some body else’s sluffy tracks! “Hey, I’m gonna just go down a little and see what it’s like OK? Yeah, I’ll wait for you right over that roll. No man, take your time, I’ll wait for you if you want. No? You sure? OK! Whoohooo! I can ski!!!

That type of thing happens in my heart and mind every time. It could be dropping in off the ridge at Jim Hill. It could be lap 5 at Yodelin. Heck, it even happens to me at the top of Muir. If you could see me now, I’m a wreck just thinking about the next time, and I only skied 2 flippin days ago! It’s just that I think it will be better next time…softer, slipperier, I’ll angulate better, I’ll tighten my boots more…I’ll see you out there. And now you know what I’m thinking. Rusty Knees

You too Rusty are a poet, expressing my sentiments well!

I have no idea what you're talking about....and I still don't understand why my friends on that hut trip in the Valhallas last year kept calling me "snake"......

Jeez!! Still waters run deep Rusty Knees. That's a POWDER worthy article right there.

To think all that was going on in you mind when I was skiing with you 2 days ago. I thought the strange crazed look in your eyes was just indigestion from the Maple Falls cupcake you ate.
Go figure! Lovely writing, thanks for sharing.

OK, (partner- insert your name here) is taking off his pack.  Good, he’s sitting down.  YES!  He’s getting out his water bottle.  I am going…I’ll pretend to wait…I am gonna be FIRST!  Hurry, get the skins off, hurry, repack, oh man!  How can he sit there?

I’m not carrying my water bottle anymore if that's how it is! Ha! I love this post; we all feel it...I think I try to harness some non-committal attitude towards it by practicing self-discipline, and finding some center of mental quietness. Otherwise the mountains and the powder will know they've won over my heart and soul. And quite frankly my friend you are married and your wife allows this form of adultery. But if I fall for them first, I'll never meet and commit to a good woman in this life. I still question the logic in this thought. You can have first tracks anytime; i'll keep pushing steeper lines.*

*this comment should be disregarded by a certain Mr. Bell, he's lost control of all reason...I'd never just set lines without condition, it's a reckless move and not at all my style of maverick*     

...I think I try to harness some non-committal attitude towards it by practicing self-discipline, and finding some center of mental quietness. Otherwise the mountains and the powder will know they've won over my heart and soul. And quite frankly my friend you are married and your wife allows this form of adultery. But if I fall for them first, I'll never meet and commit to a good woman in this life.  

Oh no? Does this go both ways?
'Cuz I'm already a goner and I fell hard!